A great event

Snap!Snap!Snap! Everyone dressed up to their best for the big party. It felt like attending some award presentation event. Black formal suits for some guys and casual wear for some chaps. For girls, some dressed in gowns or dress-to-kill outfits. I bought a new piece of dress for this event. Discarded the other dress which I planned to wear for the party. Too revealing as I mentioned some time back. The new black number is somewhat revealing too. Haha... Managed to borrow a pretty shawl to match with my dress or rather, to make my dress less skimpy-looking. I had fun. Took lots of photos.

Escape

Torn. Ripped.Used. Have I lost the last bit of my dignity? Till now I still can't comprehend the reasons for my actions. I am just like the coffee sachet which has been reused for umpteen times, thus losing its aromatic flavour.

I need a place for retreat. Somewhere I can escape to.

'Click' and my mailbox showed, 'Can you please see me when you're in the office? Thanks XXX.'

Fxxk!! What have I done? I swallowed hard. My imaginations started to run wild, really really wild. I've always been careful about my work. I do not waste company resources. So,what is it? What've gone wrong? Maybe it is something good. It may not be anything bad as what my good friend S told me.

Couldn't sleep well the night before. Nervous. Scared. But not trembling. I need to keep cool. Time to get to work. Reached my office. Time to face the music.

'Knock knock'.
'You want to see me right?'
'Yes.'
'We apologised for not XXXXxx... '

Just some issue about not adjusting my pay in time. Phew! Gave me a fright! Skipped my lunch because of this. Got me worried for nothing. Killed my brain cells for nothing.

I Wish

I wish I was funnier
Maybe that way I could keep you laughing all day

I wish I was wittier
Maybe that way I could keep you entertain all the time

I wish I could write better
Maybe that way we could write a book together

I wish I could articulate better
Maybe that way we could hold an interesting conversation every time

I wish I was callous
Maybe that way I would not give my love generously

I wish I was sharper
Maybe that way I could see it coming

I wish I was just having a bad dream
Maybe that way I could sleep better after that

Got to improve...

Need to improve... need to write more... :S

I love you, Ma Ma

I love you, Ma Ma. I love you. I know she can hear me even though she was not exactly looking at me. I know she can. Her grip on my hand seemed weaker than before. I so much so wanted to tell her how much I enjoy my current job and how much so I detest working long hours. Tell her about the things she has done for me as a child. How I love the vegetarian meal she prepared from scratch. How she would do my hair like a princess. How she would pick me up from school during my lower primary days. How aromatic the coffee she used to brew.And the many occasions where she would stuff some money in my hands to buy things for myself as a teenager. How I enjoyed staying overnight at her place including my brothers and cousins. Time is running out. My vision is blurred now with nothing but tears...

Departure

I can only bury my face in tears, nothing but tears. I need a comfort hug badly but I couldn't find any. My mum told me that my grandma will depart from our lives soon, in another month's time. My grandma is bedridden, always sleeping away regardless the time of the day. I've yet to tell her how much I love her, I really do. If I don't start telling her my love for her and how much I adore her, I know I will end up regretting for the rest of my life. And I am fully aware that she will not be able to say that she love each and every grandchild , her sons and daughters but I know she wanted to so much. I always hear how my elder brother would find my grandma crying away on a few rare occasions when he paid a visit to her during the time she was hospitalised. Why is my grandma having such a hard life when she has contributed so much to her family? She is so in pain but she can't scream or moan. Will my dad be able to accept the reality when the time comes? I do not know. I know I will collapse in tears. Call me a weakling. Yes, I am. I will keep on crying till I can't cry no more. My eyes hurt now but I couldn't put a halt to my tears.

H asked me a few days ago if I will cry for him should he die. I kept quiet because it was taboo to ask such a question about death and he thought that I won't cry for him. Yes, I will cry for you should you depart from my life forever even if no one else did. Memories of you, your unique smell, presence will be kept safely in my special safe where only I have the key to unlock it.

Minesweeper

I have never been more serious than before. It was so intense. 3, 2,1,1,1,4,7,2,2,3,1,1,1. What do these numbers mean? Of course, they meant something. They are clues for me. Clues for locating and avoiding mines to prevent me from making an early exit out of the game. Played minesweeper during lunch, after lunch , during dinner, after dinner, during midnight and after midnight. Others busy mugging for exams, and me busy 'working' intensively to locate all the mine-free cells. Thanks to the nature of my job, I'm getting extremely 'sensitive' to numbers. After 2 days of hard work (played this game since Tues to Thurs except Wed) , I can finally see the fruits of the seeds that I sow. I finished the Beginner's level of Minesweep in 75 seconds without hitting the 10 hidden mines. Am I good or am I good? I will try my hands on intermediate level which means I need to avoid 40 mines. Am not gonna start on that level yet, I want to enjoy the sweet success of my amazing achievement still, else I'll be sowing the seeds of my own destruction! It was such a magical moment. No other competitor, just me, the Winner of Minesweeper for Beginner's Level . Thank you.

Break a leg!

Horseshoe is said to be a lucky charm. For you, H.

I know it is not an easy feat to focus hard and not be distracted by the slightest things around you. It is the last exam that you're taking and soon you'll break away from these hateful exams forever. Just try. Concentrate. Break a leg! If you need anything to boost your concentration, you know you can count on me. Anytime. Wherever I am. This is my promise to you.

Chocolates, just chocolates

Looking through my family fridge to ensure no storage of expired stuff in it. Saw a box of chocolates bought from London a couple of months back. I thought half the contents inside has been consumed since my whole family is a big fan of chocolates. I decided to check out the current status of this box of chocolates. Who knows, I may find maggots feasting away on those chocolates. Yewww... To my surprise, no one has opened the box and I could practically resell it to an interested buyer if there is any. No presence of maggots, worms and all the mouth-watering pieces looked as if they were purhased yesterday. I decided to 'sacrifice' myself and tried one of the chocolate pieces. Don't they look delicious? These chocolates are from Thornton's, very good chocolates. I think they taste better than Godiva and slightly cheaper too. Sadly, these are available in the UK only. Can't wait to return back to London again. Miss the amazing people I met during my last trip there.

Retail Therapy

I will not like to think myself as a shopaholic. However, my recent behaviour seems to show signs that I am one. One of my favourite haunts is Borders. Been buying a couple of books from there. I wonder if the staff there would find me a familiar face. Not that it matters much to me anyway. Everytime I pay a visit to the bookstore, I'll have the tendency to grab one book title. Was I a shoplifter in my previous life? I can't seem to keep my hands off the books. The difference between a shoplifter and myself is that I paid for all the books that I picked up.

I admit that I am seeking solace in retail therapy (thankfully, not in food these days). I felt gay when I found something which I liked. But when my credit card bills arrive, rest assured that you won't find me smiling away. I do my 'best' to control my spending. Maybe I should ask my mum to keep my credit cards, so that I won't be tempted to spend unneccessary. I pamper myself too much, way too much.

How much am I worth as at 11-11-2006?

How much am I worth as at 11-11-2006? A month ago, I was worth or rather, my blog was worth nothing. It couldn't hit even a two-cent mark. Was I demoralised / sucidal / dejected / disillusioned / morbid / woebegone? Not at all, in fact I was tickled by the result. Out of fun, I commenced to find out how much some of the blogs are worth. I chose my favourite blogs and wow, one of them was worth approximately 109 grand, a far far far cry from my 'worthless' blog. Now, as at 11-11-2006, my blog is worth a humble amount of $564.54, > 100% increase in value. Yay!!! Should I conduct an audit investigation on what led to the increase in value since it hit the materiality value of > 5%? Of course not, I won't be so daft to do that even though I do 'LOVE' my job very much. I feel like I have 'made' some money on some investment. Just a funny thought.

My blog is worth $564.54.
How much is your blog worth?

Japanese Curry

I decided to prepare Japanese curry, one of my favourite food. Main ingredients : 1Big onion, 1 large size carrot, 10 baby potatoes, 3 chicken legs and one crucial item- japanese curry mix (I use Golden Curry sauce mix from S & B Brand). The preparation is fairly easy. Simply stir-fry the chopped onion till it is fragrant, next add the carrot and baby potatoes and chicken pieces and stir-fry till they're cooked. Add 2 and half bowls of boiled water. Use your own discretion accordingly on the amount of water to add. Simmer for 10 mins. Add in the curry mix and stir lightly till the stock thickens. Serve with rice. Note: Carrots must be completely cooked , else they taste horrible if they're still raw. Success rate is pretty high for first timers. Cooking is so fun but the washing up sucks.

The Things I Love About You

I love the way you make me laugh

I love the way you make me cry

~

Tears of joy stream from my eyes

As I hear your voice, a loving surprise

~

I love the way you creep behind my back

Even when I protest each time

~

I love the way you make the ghostly noise

And continue so when my face turns pale

~

I love you when you're sad

For I will take the sadness away

So you will feel love once again

~

I love you when you try to read out the mandarin subtitles

I love you when you send chinese sms to me

~

I love you when you cry

As it pains me to see you hurt

~

I love you when you're glad

When you tell me of the day you had

~

I love you when you kiss me on my forehead before I sleep

I love you when you stroke my hair gently like a baby

~

I love you truly

I love you deeply

I love you madly

~

Ever since the day

I let you meet me

~

I missed you when you left

I miss you now more than ever

~

Making a mistake that I regret

Hoping that you are a forgiver

~

Without you, my life is strife

But now I ask for a second chance

~

I wait for you as the days go by

My love is growing inch by inch

~

I cannot wait to see you again

But I wait for you, and your warm kiss

~

I love you

Feelings

I wish that my feelings are made of paper where I can fold it up and chuck it away in some corner of my house. Or light them with fire, turning them to ashes. If only feelings can be rewritten, I would first erase my current feelings. Truth is, this is not possible.

I love sale

Sale is only good if one can find the right merchandise with the right price. As a young teenager, I would fall prey to sale goods regardless they are my needs or wants. And on most occassions, I'd end up with 'buyer's regrets'. I'll try to avoid such moments if I can help it.

Went window-shopping with a galfriend of mine with no plans to spend my hard-earned money. I swear (fingers crossed). I entered into a boutique which was having a SALE and stumbled upon a nice dark grey skirt. S$30 anyways, still within my budget. I always remind myself to live frugally but somehow or rather, I end up spending more. I don't spend just on myself but on my family, good friends, him... blah blah blah...

New pants? Old pants?

I don't make plans as to what I should wear to work daily. I'd grab whatever I feel like wearing for that morning. So, this morning I chose a pair of pants which I haven't been wearing for a couple of weeks I think. Alas, I can practically put my two hands inside my pants and they were hanging loosely on my hips like a pair of hipster pants. An old pair of working pants yet it seems that it has to be worn differently now. I definitely can't wear a working shirt with them. Not long enough to be tucked underneath them. What's the next available option? A skirt, I supposed. I slipped into my skirt lazily, adjusted my shirt, picked up my suit jacket, my laptop with the weight of an new born or maybe slightly lighter and my tote bag, and headed out of the house.

Not again!

Is it Monday or is it me? I think I'm developing sore throat symptoms again.

Things that I've done during my living life

01. Received two stalks of lilies when I was sick at home 3 yrs ago
02. Built a snowman
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Gave directions to tourists in London when I was a tourist myself :P
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a bubble bath with someone
08. Said "I love you" and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Lost US$20 in jackpot
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea - from the shore
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Had a whole lobster to myself on my birthday
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby's diaper
21. Went on a car chasing ride
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Won consolation prize in the lottery sweep
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Participated in a campcraft competition
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Wrote a love letter
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe with someone I love most
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited San Francisco
52. Cooked a meal for house guests
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Baked a birthday cake for someone special
62. Kissed in the swimming pool
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Gave email address instead of phone number to a guy
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played the same music disc for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Took private lessons on skiing
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Lived in Hong Kong
82. Been on television news programs as an "expert"
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Cooked curry chicken for the first time and succeeded
92. Chatted on the phone for more than 8 hours straight including toilet breaks
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently well enough to have a decent conversation
95. Ordered drinks without paying
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Visited Taiwan for a day
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn't stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn't have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Had homegrown vegetables for dinner in Rye by 2 amazing hosts.
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Walked into the gents' instead of ladies'
110. Broken someone's heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Watched 'Phantom of The Opera', 'Lion King' and 'The Producers' musicals in London
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Puked after having 5 different types of wine
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Had Ghirardelli chocolates at Ghirardelli Square
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Visited Brussels
134. Read The Iliad
135. Selected one "important" author who you missed in school, and read
136. Jogged in the streets of Philadelphia near UPenn during winter.
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Almost burnt down a kitchen

Amazing singing session

Engaged in a singing session with a couple of galfriends. I had a mild difficulty reading all the chinese characters on the tv screen. I'd just paused whenever I encountered words which appeared 'alien' to me. Had a problem getting the right key tone for the songs I chose especially chinese ones. I seemed to croon better for English numbers which are mostly oldies. Sang songs from Carpenters and Abba, my all-time favourites. Screamed my lungs out for 'Dancing Queen' and 'MaMa Mia' and dancing around the ktv room with creative moves like a lunatic. Suddenly, I felt like I was gonna develop the annoying sore throat again. But I was not the least bit worried, simply gargle with salt water and I could continue with more singing again!! The rest of my galfriends went deranged too. All the six lovely babes started to synchronise their dance moves for one particular cantonese pop song by 'Grasshoppers'. I didn't join them in their madness but I do enjoyed their excellent performance.

I can fit in it now.

I lost another 2.205pounds of unwanted fats. Good news is I can finally slip into my Mango dress effortlessly. Looking at the mirror with the dress hanging nicely on my body somehow brings a smile on my face though I'm not exactly smiling. I must say that this black number is kinda revealing at the front. It may seem inappropriate to wear it for my upcoming dinner and dance event organised by my firm. I wouldn't want to risk having my male colleagues to be staring at my chest as their main activity of the night. In fact, I would love to be clothed in this beautiful outfit in any social private event. The possibility of someone wearing the same dress as me is rather low since I bought it a few years ago. Key words: A few years ago. I need a second opinion. It is a waste of financial resources to get a new outfit for just one event.

Exam's over

Took the last paper of my course. Made some silly mistakes. I froze when the invigilator said 'stop writing!' I really stopped writing because the invigilator was already standing right beside me since I was sitting last at the back of the row. I seldom leave questions unanswered but this time round, I left 3 qns blank. Now I truly understand how the examinees felt when they couldn't continue writing while the rest could still scribble their final answers as the 'paper collector' made his/her way to collect each piece of these hateful exam scripts. It won't kill to give just 10 complimentary secs to me. Just 10 secs is all I need. Sigh... It is my last and I want it to be the last, so that I can advance to the next stage of my career. Plus, I want to devote all my annual leave to overseas travelling. Oh well, I'll know when the results are published next month. Sigh.......

Headed down to town to unwind for the day since I'll be robbed of this basic luxury once I return back to work the next day. Felt hungry and got a box of octopus-filled tako pachi. Never had this for a long long long long long time. Had mineral water to quench my thirst and it tasted nectar to me. Too thirsty I supposed.*winkz*

Tequila

Saw Tequila the other day. He kept rubbing his head against my shoes. A new habit maybe. To me it appears that he is trying to use my shoes to scratch his head. I was amused rather than annoyed even though he was rubbing his small head against my favourite pair of shoes. When I managed to take a closer look at him, I realised that his neck was slightly hairless in small patches and there was some redness around the neck area. I wish that it is just the neck collar that is causing the allergy to Tequila. Get well soon, Tequila.