Strange. Really strange.

These days I fear losing my loved ones especially my parents. When I first lost my granny, I was desvastated. My world came crumpling down. It hit me real hard amongst other things. I fell into depression, took anti-depressant pills. They seemed to help everytime I took them. It calmed me down. I find it hard to run to my mum and cry in front of her. I did once when my relationship ended. The one that made me cry the hardest. It pained my mum. And every guy that comes along seems so wrong. There was one guy who asked me if I am going to own a CPA firm next time since I was doing a CPA program. I wonder if he likes me or my CPA qualification. It is strange. Really strange. I was astounded by his question then. And amused. It is not a bad idea being single than risk getting hurt in a relationship. Tired of the crying game. Tired of hearing hurtful words. Tired of sleepless nights. One good thing about breakup is that I always look better when I am out of a relationship than when I am in one. Strange. Really strange. I just want my parents to be in good health many many years to come. There are many better things to enjoy in life than dating.

Troubled

These days I'm having trouble sleeping. I wonder if the long break is doing me more harm than good. I yearns for ample rest when I was working hard like a dog. And when I have all the time in the world, my body just wouldn't listen. Physically tired but mentally awake. I simply couldn't stop thinking about everything, all kind of thoughts be it trivial or not. So, for the first time, I took cough syrup before I slept last night. It seems to work well on me. I slept well throughout the night. And no, I am not suicidal. I thought I can sleep better if I work out everyday but it just kept me awake at night.

I think I am used to working long hours and a mere 3-4 hrs of sleep is more than sufficient for me. Or maybe it is the age thingy. The older one gets, the less amount of rest one needs. Or maybe I just need to reconstruct my life.

Amazing day for me 20.08.2008

My mum cooked me yummy birthday noodles and prepared red eggs on my birthday. In fact, I requested for them. I felt like a kid even though I m way way older. :) Loved her!!! And my dad, sent me a birthday SMS even though he was at home the whole day. Cute right? Met up with my two good friends for dinner on my birthday. Had this grilled seafood 5 course dinner at this restaurant called "Angus Steakhouse". Great place, nice ambience and great food. I am very satisfied and felt really fortunate to have spend my day in this wonderful manner.

My Birthday Celebration

As you can see from the picture above, guys are really scarce here.

Had a birthday bash at some club last Friday, 15.08.2008. It was good. Invited some friends, colleagues and my family (only my elder bro came). Received many pressies. Among all, my favourites are a bouquet of champagne roses and a tiffany charm pendant. Drank quite abit and spent quite a bit on drinks. There were more female guests than male ones. I tried to invite more guys to my party but sadly, guys are rather scarce these days especially in my profession and out of my profession.

My favourite Tiffany

My good friend, J and myself

My bro and myself

Had my favourite flaming lambogini and took lotsa photos throughout the party. Taking pics is one of my favourite hobbies too, i.e., provided that I am inside the pics. hahaha... Had my friends sang me Birthday song with a nice tasty chocolate cake. Felt really blessed to have so many lovely and sweet friends and the special someone to celebrate my birthday. Everyone made my day. I have never been happier.