Strange. Really strange.

These days I fear losing my loved ones especially my parents. When I first lost my granny, I was desvastated. My world came crumpling down. It hit me real hard amongst other things. I fell into depression, took anti-depressant pills. They seemed to help everytime I took them. It calmed me down. I find it hard to run to my mum and cry in front of her. I did once when my relationship ended. The one that made me cry the hardest. It pained my mum. And every guy that comes along seems so wrong. There was one guy who asked me if I am going to own a CPA firm next time since I was doing a CPA program. I wonder if he likes me or my CPA qualification. It is strange. Really strange. I was astounded by his question then. And amused. It is not a bad idea being single than risk getting hurt in a relationship. Tired of the crying game. Tired of hearing hurtful words. Tired of sleepless nights. One good thing about breakup is that I always look better when I am out of a relationship than when I am in one. Strange. Really strange. I just want my parents to be in good health many many years to come. There are many better things to enjoy in life than dating.